Yesterday was my birthday. I arrived exhausted from my flight from Guatemala, but my mother greeted me with: the song won’t come on! The song she was referring to was, Estas Son Las Mañanitas. She plays the spanish version of the birthday song for me every year, be it at home or on the phone when I am not near her.
There were several 10 minute naps peppered throughout the day, but never being quite able to succumb to sleep. My mind and heart were occupied with the anticipation of a someone showing up to sweep me away.
At three, my recently reconnected (from a once upon a long time ago meet up) buddy and I met up for the January birthdays hug exchange! We followed up with a cup of chai/joe at MUD and then I accompanied him to the MegaBus stop in Midtown. Warm hugs were appreciated. ^___^
Rushed home for my 6pm dinner, arranged by my favorite lady, Meg. Turns out, there was no need to rush. So I lay on my bed, with my dog, thinking about he and I having made three years of companionship. “Reunited” by Peaches & Herb played in my head.
Then, anticipation turned into the realization that two important people were not going to show up! Regardless of the reasons, I suddenly felt a strong sense of abandonment. Not exactly what anyone wants to feel, especially on their birthday. Anger took over, which was really masked deep hurt. Later in the evening, some clarification eased their failure to be present, but sitting here now, I’m realizing I am still feeling abandoned.
Meg however, along with Kross, came to the rescue. Dinner took place at The Green Table at Chelsea Market, a place I’ve been wanting to dine at. The wine, the appetizers, the dinner, my dessert were all amazing. Thank you for keeping me in your hearts and giving me warmth on my birthday.
So my 27th, it’s already experienced a bumpy transition. I hope for the strength to cut off the pain— in whatever form it appears in. I hope to forgive and forget, because right now I’m harboring hurt. But, I hope to show the people who’ve called/emailed/tweeted/texted the same importance they have shown me.